Wednesday 29 June 2011

Beardless

I've had a beard since 1991 or thereabouts, so just about twenty years. Not that it was ever much of a beard, more a sort of designer stubble, with the emphasis far more on stubble than designer. After much complaining by She Who Must Be Obeyed, who insisted that the beard had become too white, it was removed a couple of days ago.

Now there's this strange man staring back at me whenever I look in the bathroom mirror!

He has jowls. He has a turned-down mouth. He has strange contours in his skin. He has a sagging neck…

Twenty years of gradual physical change, nay, deterioration, had clearly been subtly and effectively camouflaged by that minor hirsute appendage, unassuming though it was.

So here's a warning to all who are considering the removal of facial hair after numerous years: think carefully of the consequences before putting blade to skin! Will you be able to face the end result?

As for me, I shall remain clean-shaven, at least for the duration of the electric razor that I bought especially for that purpose. It would be a shame to waste the money, after all.

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